I’ve stopped, for now.

One of my biggest struggles since I’ve come to Australia, is to learn to just stop. Working as a wedding photographer and sidelining as a photographer’s assistant, it was always going for shoots, editing images, meeting clients. It was always go-go-go. I’m sure I’m not the most hardworking photographer out there, there’s always going to be someone more hardworking than me, but I was moving at a pace that I was comfortable in, that kept me busy.

And then I came here. And just… stopped.

It was really difficult at first. I came from a country where everyone is always working and all my friends had busy lives and our jobs kept us to wee hours of the morning, to just coming here and basically do nothing.

Now, however, I find it strangely refreshing.

It has led me to find out what I want, where I want to go and who I want to be. There are no expectations here. No one expects me to be any certain way. Trust me when I say it wasn’t easy getting to the point of being comfortable not working. I have no income, and sometimes I just sit blankly in my chair thinking to myself that I’m bored, I have nothing to do, which can go on for a while. And I’ve come to terms with it.

I’ve started reading again – currently I’m halfway through ‘QBQ!’ by John G, Miller. I’ve started to be a little more adventurous in the kitchen, realizing that some of the things I think I can’t do, I actually can. I’m slowly learning how to do housework.

Eventually, I’ll be working again. I’ll be busy, running errands, going places, and I’m going to miss having downtime. So right now, I’ll savor it while I still can.